#1243 Apple’s Friend Bar, Talk At/To, Infinitely, Facebook Sued, How Was The Movie?

Show 1243 Thursday 15 July

Watch today's show at YouTube or BlipTV.

Hi, I’m Sarah, welcome to The Daily English Show.

Today we’re studying a video from The Onion called: New Apple Friend Bar Gives Customers Someone To Talk At About Mac Products.

This is a parody news story, by the way, in case you’re not familiar with The Onion, and they’re announcing Apple’s new Friend Bars.

Apple actually has something called a Genius Bar – in the United States anyway, I don’t know if it’s in any other countries - where you can make a reservation with a "genius" who will talk to you about your computer. So I guess "genius" is just their fancy name for a sales assistant or a customer services person. And they’ll talk to you and give you some advice and then encourage you to buy more stuff.

And this video is making a joke about the stereotypical Mac user who is obsessive about their computer and about Apple products and they annoy shop workers and their friends with very boring one-sided conversations.

So this Friend Bar will have staff who are specially trained to listen to these Apple fans.

They say the employees are: specially trained to carry on lengthy conversations about even the most arcane Apple-related topics.

Arcane is an adjective which means: understood by few or mysterious.

The reporter says the bar is for Apple users who are: looking for someone to talk at.

If you have a normal conversation, you talk to someone. But if the conversation is one-sided, if you’re just rambling on about stuff that is only of interest to you and you have no intention of ever letting the other person speak, then you’re talking at someone.

STICK NEWS

Kia ora in Stick News today a man in New York has sued Facebook and says that he owns 84% of the company.

Facebook was launched in 2004 and is now the biggest social networking site in the world.

A guy called Paul is suing Facebook. He claims that a contract he signed in 2003 entitles him to 84% of the company.

A Facebook spokesperson says they believe the suit is frivolous.

And that was Stick News for Thursday the 15th of July.

Kia ora.

But how can you NOT be on Facebook? Is that even possible?!

sigh

What shall I write in the contract?

Just cut and paste some legal-sounding crap... no one ever reads the small print anyway.

I know exactly where this document needs to be files...

ROFLCOPUTER!

Word of the Day

Today’s word is infinitely.

Infinitely is an adverb which means: very much. And it’s often used in comparisons, and the example here is: Your English is infinitely better than my German.

And that is definitely true because I only know about five words of German.

In today’s video they give this example of something that Apple users like to talk about:

Why Safari is an infinitely better browser than Firefox.

conversations with sarah

#793 How was the movie?

Step 1: Repeat Thomas’s lines.

Step 2: Read Thomas’s lines and talk to Sarah.

Thomas How was the movie?

Sarah Hmm.

Thomas That bad, huh?

Sarah No, it wasn’t terrible. I enjoyed bits of it. It was quite funny in places.

Thomas But you’ve seen better?

Sarah Yeah. It … wasn’t the greatest move I’ve ever seen.

Thomas What was it about?

Sarah It was basically about three guys and their relationships with women.

New Apple Friend Bar Gives Customers Someone To Talk At About Mac Products - TRANSCRIPT

Building on the success of their Genius Bars, today Apple stores across the country unveiled the Friend Bar, where obsessive Apple users can come to discuss Mac products at length.

Onion News Network tech trends reporter Jeff Tate has more.

Thanks Andrea.

Apple users looking for someone to talk at about the newest Twitter iPhone ap or why Safari is an infinitely better browser than Firefox, can now simply make an appointment at Apple’s new Friend Bar.

Free to anyone with an Apple care warranty, the Friend Bar is staffed by Apple employees specially trained to carry on lengthy conversations about even the most arcane Apple-related topics.

Unlike your girlfriend or your coworkers, we’re not going to get tired of discussing the wireless networking capabilities of the Snow Leopard operating system. We’re here and we’re ready to listen.

The Friend Bar is already a success, with some Apple fans scheduling appointments up to four hours in length.

It drives me so nuts that Firefox is disabling the plug-in for Maemo RC3.

Yep.

Genius Bars across the country are reporting shorter wait times as customers who just want to impress Apple employees with their ironic desktop image or their impeccably-organized iTunes library, are re-directed to the Friend Bar.

And the discussions don’t have to be limited to Apple products. Friend Bar employees are trained to discuss a range of topics Apple customers are interested in. From finding a good Neapolitan pizza, to talking to girls you aren’t already in an improv troop with.

I think that what our customers appreciate is the fact that they’ve got a multi-national consumer electronic organization that they can relate to.

The Friend Bar is not the only good news for Apple fans, the 24 hour friend line connects users to call centres overseas, where they can talk about Apple even after store hours.

That’s just using GarageBand and I like to use iMovie if I’m just making a slide show or something …

Oh, yes!

… or I’ll use Final Cut Express for anything that’s more elaborate …

Of course, sir.

… like yesterday I uploaded some footage of some kids skateboarding.

Oh, that is very interesting.

The company also announced that next year it will roll out the iStore a miniature version of an Apple store, which customers can set up in their own homes.

It’s going to be about 6000 dollars for the hardware. Then there’s a monthly salary for your personal Apple employee. And then of course anything you buy from the store.

For tech trends, I’m Jeff Tate.

Thank you Jeff. Moving on, in a diplomatic show of good will, China will be sending two Tibetan monks to the national zoo in Washington.

links

today's news

Genius Bar - Apple's site

Genius Bar - Wikipedia

Hahaha - IMDB

Hahaha - Auckland International Film Festival

Hahaha - news story

roflcopter - Wikitionary

roflcopter - image

roflcopter - video

music

show start
artist: Kevin MacLeod
track: Future Cha Cha
from: Brooklyn, NY, United States
artist site

WOD start
artist: DJ iPep's
album: Home Mix 2007
track: Game Toy
from: EVREUX, France
album at Jamendo
artist at Jamendo
artist site

cws start
artist: Kevin MacLeod
track: The Jazz Woman
from: Brooklyn, NY, United States
artist site

qa start
artist: ioeo
album: triptracks
track: triptrack2
from: Saint Raphael, France
album at Jamendo
artist at Jamendo
artist site

qa bgm

artist: Still Playing Guitar
album: Still Playing Guitar
track: Nachtschatten
from: Heidelberg, Germany

album at Jamendo
artist at Jamendo

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